Nasty Excuses

These are excuse notes from parents (with their original spelling) collected by schools from all over the country

1) My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.

2) Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.

3) Dear Nasty School: Please exscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29,30, 31, 32, and also 33.

4) Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating.

5) Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his     hip.

6) John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.

7) Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part of     asset.

8) Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.

9) Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.

10) Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.

11) Please excuse Pedro from being absent yesterday. He had (diahre) (dyrea) (direathe) the runs.       [words in ()'s were crossed out.]

12) Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.

13) Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.

14) Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father's fault.

15) I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don't know what size       she wears.

16) Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the       porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.

17) Sally won't be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.

18) My daughter was absent yesterday because she was tired. She spent a weekend with the       Marines.

19) Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.

20) Please excuse Mary for being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps.

21) Maryann was absent December 11-16, because she had a fever, sore throat, headache and       upset stomach. Her sister was also sick, fever and sore throat, her brother had a low grade      fever  and ached all over. I wasn't the best either, sore throat and fever. There must be      something     going around, her father even got hot last night.

22) Please excuse little Jimmy for not being in school yesterday. His father is gone and I could not       get him ready because I was in bed with the doctor

23) Please excuse Ryan coz i didn't made his homework

24) My daughter celine will not come to school today. She is suffering from hangover created       yesterday

25) My daddy told you to tell this "Dog has ate my writing hand"

We give training for this kind of piss-off matters in our Nasty School.

1) Spitting chewing gum on the washbasins & toilets.

2) Scribbling about love affairs on school walls.

3) Pouring ink on teachers dress

4) Keeping thorn on teachers chair

5) Sleeping inside the classroom

6) Reading erotic books when the class is going.

7) Teachers are empowered to murder you without punishment

8) Piss at anywhere inside the school campus

9) Students can come to school in Lorry also

10) Sports Training would be like below.

More humur at DCU.